Nana

A beautiful Spring day. Flowers blooming, birds singing sweet songs of joy and family surrounding me for a quiet evening at home. A simple phone call adds another dimension entirely to the day. The nurse says an ambulance has been called. Shirley is "just not herself". She is unresponsive and having trouble breathing. Urgently, I grab my shoes and head for the car. Keith is right there with me, as always. We arrive as the EMT's are about to load her guerney into the ambulance. A glassy stare greets my smile and touch to her cool cheek. "Nana, Nana, are you ok? Can you smile for me?" My inane requests bring only a flicker of perception to her jewel blue eyes. As they do their work, I continue to chat rather illogically to her. After five years of Alzheimer's and three of no familial recognition, you would think I would behave differently. But, she is still my sweet Nana and I still know her. I miss the sparkle I used to receive, even if briefly, when she would fleetingly remember who I am. Her beautiful eyes would literally twinkle and she'd give me this adorable half smile, half smirk expression that told me I was still her Kathy Anne. But for too long now, even that has been missing. But still, she's never been like this before.

We arrive to a very turbulent ER. All rooms are full. The waiting room is full. And more are on the way. Despite all of this, they are still very attentive and begin working with us right away. A CT and chest xray are ordered along with an approximate 999 blood tests requiring no less than 12 "sticks" to her tiny arms. I truly fear the tape will pull her papery thin skin off! I am so not looking forward to removing it.

The above notes were what I began while sitting with Nana in the hospital for a week. She was diagnosed when we arrived, and after much testing, with congestive heart failure and renal failure. We were told to call in the family just in case. But after some ups and downs, lots of love, visitors and prayer, God saw fit to reverse the failures! She was returned 'home' to Golden Living just as before after about 6 days in the hospital. So much happened, good and bad. I wish I had had time to 'document' it all. I will say, even in the state she was in, she sure did seem to relish the love and affection from all of the family that came to see her. Hopefully, in some way, she was able to 'recognize' our love.