Sorrow

sorrow, definitely not something foreign to me, but a feeling i'm meeting again as an adult, like a long lost childhood friend. it's not altogether different, simply new facets of the same. deeper, enveloping, not completely consuming, but oh so close. deeper, thorough, so all-encompassing that i feel my body bursting with it. deep.
odd how you can feel the sadness with other feelings too. sorrow is the christmas tree with adornments of love, joy, excitement, anger, etc.
why is death so sorrowful? why does it break us like this? it's an " in your face", direct view of complete separation. separate. alone. gone. what word can completely describe the finality? there isn't one. no word to convey the gut-wrenching, soul-etching void.
sorrow like all the other feelings---it's not about them, it's about us. ouch. the vanity of it---our loss, our hurt. they're gone, moved on. our despair, our desire, our longing. their longing is over. ours continues.
separation, a picture of how our souls feel with the great void of Christ, the void of God at the center. oh, the utter despair.
sorrow. it is what it is. it won't heal...that would make it no longer sorrow. it just is. feel it. acknowledge it, ride it. like the ocean it ebbs and flows, the waves wash over you, threatening to overtake you, but don't panic...ride with it. feel it. be the wave and you'll wind up on top again. the sun in your face, the wind in your hair and spots of the salty wave glistening on your soul.